Let Kids Be Kids

Growing up, there were these three solitary trees that loomed far in the distance from my house. They always seemed to be calling us – come climb our branches, sit in our shade, jump in our leaves. I can remember as a kid asking for permission to go down to the Three Trees (yes, the name was capitalized, since in my mind it was a proper noun just as much as Cincinnati or Omaha).

So, with mom’s blessing – and perhaps a sack lunch – we’d hike off across the fields that led from our house to a day of adventure.

I was reminded of those trees by two recent conversations. One was with my neighbor, who was reminiscing about the days spent fishing at local ponds when he was a kid. Like us, he and his friends would disappear for a day of seclusion, where fun was limited only by the imagination – and where there wasn’t a parent or adult in sight.

The other was with a mom worried about what our kids would do during the summer in the event we do not build a local $34 million community center.

Wow, has life really changed that much? Is the world that much smaller, that there are no adventures for kids to find on their own? Or has it become so dangerous that the only places we feel they can be safe are within our view or the confines of a controlled structure or activity?

I worry about today’s kids, whose lives seem to be planned out days, months and years in advance. I recently read of a ten year-old who played more than 100 baseball games last year. No big deal, we played that many and more every summer when I was growing up.

The difference is that we played four or five a side – sometimes even one-on-one – with no umpires, no uniforms and with scrap plywood for bases. This kid travels hundreds of miles with select teams, in the hope that someday he might get a shot at the major leagues. But is he having fun?

Because that is what childhood should be about. Fun, adventure, learning. With no coaches or umpires we had to pick teams (tossed bats and "bottle caps"), make up ground rules (a ball under the bushes is a double) and argue over hits, runs and outs. Along the way we not only learned baseball, but also leadership, compromise and conflict resolution. And we had a blast doing it.

Today, kids’ schedules are so packed with soccer practice, piano lessons and dance recitals that I fear they are missing out on developing some of those intangible skills that are just as important, if not more so, than the nuts-and-bolt talents their structured pursuits require.

I’ve always chuckled when I read how poorly U.S. students stack up academically with those from other nations. If we lag so far behind, why is it that we seem to run everything? From mass-produced automobiles to fast food, from music to the internet, we have led the way in just about every industrial, technical and cultural innovation.

I would argue that it’s because we have always valued creativity over conformity. Yet in a world where twelve year-olds now carry Day-Timers and Palm Pilots, I fear that they are going straight from cradle to cubicle.

I think we’d all be better off if they spent a little more time down at the Three Trees.